Mechanics

The following excerpt was taken from the book "On The Safe Edge"  written by Trevor Jaques and published by WholeSM Publishing.  By far one of the best books available today on BDSM and it's inner workings.  Highly recommended by BDSM Eroticism as a must read.  Get your copy today.

Most sessions or scenes will provide stimuli to the brain of both the top and bottom at such speeds that the conscious mind will rarely be able to perform an analysis of it at the time. Nor is anyone likely to want to at the time either; because were usually to far engrossed in the fun we're having. When we play, we have to provide some kind of feed-back to our partner about what really turns us on, so that we can have the best scene possible.  This may be done consciously or unconsciously. As two people get to know each other better, the cues passing between them become more easily read and, possibly, more subtle.

A couple might become like a soloist playing an instrument: the Top is a highly skilled musician able to exact the most exquisite music from the favorite instrument, the Bottom. Doubtless there is potential for the reverse to be true; in the case of the dominant bottom, for example. The cues and responses between the two become smooth, subconscious flows of energy. This is when the really exciting scenes take place.

What will be discussed here is the various types of cues, stimulation's and winding downs and how all this can affect both the Top and Bottom within the scene.

CUE

One way to make sure a scene or session continues as long as it possibly can and for as long as you both have time and the energy is to ensure that the stimulation comes when the bottom is ready. To do this the top must be able to very accurately read the bottom, his or her movements, sighs and groans and so forth, while observing for the next cue that he or she is ready for the next stimulation. There are several types of cues and they are as follows.

Aural Cue

This may be a verbal cue such as a sigh, humming... and so on in which the Top will hear and know that the bottom is ready for the next stimulation. It also helps if the top can give some form of cue to let the bottom know that the next stimulation is coming which also adds the element of anticipation to the session.

Visual Cue

The bottom may give a cue that may be seen such as a body movement or jerking motion that he or she is ready.. much like the bottom who raises their bottom towards you for you to spank and then once the spank has been received recoils and then moves back outward again signifying readiness for another.

Tactile Cue

If the session involves physical touch then the cue could be stroking a certain area of the body from either indicating readiness for the next stimulation. A gentle touch can work wonders in creating anticipation in the other.

Stimulation

Once the cue has been given by either, the stimulation itself then occurs. This is the part of the session that most people associate with SM. There is no particular reason for this stimulation to involve pain, however. A feather is a particularly effective way to torture someone. There are many forms of stimulation and I am sure many will want to explore them all so this section will leave that to you to discover.

Assimilation

Once the stimulus has been given, the bottom will need time to deal with it, understand what it was, and how he/she feels about it. This process will vary considerably depending on the type of stimulation and the person involved. The assimilation period may be instantaneous, or take a while longer. Once the assimilation process is complete the bottom with then need to recover from the stimulus. Granted if you are doing a paddling, the time it takes for the bottom to assimilate will most liked be instant, being that it is the pain he or she feels and enjoys, but the recovery period depending on intensity could take a bit longer. Then, when all has returned, the bottom will then signal or cue the Top he or she is ready for the next stimulus.

Peaking

As the scene begins things are most like to go slowly, delicately increasing in intensity until you both have reach your peaks. As important as it was in how you reached this peak it is important that you come down in a safe manner as well. Slowly decreasing the intensity of the session and bringing the bottom down helps in this in that the bottoms senses processing do not overload from excess or sudden lack of information to process.

I wish to take this time to thank the Authors of "On the Safe Edge" for such a wonderful and enlightening book This page was developed using "On the Safe Edge" as a guide. This section is part of what was written, but not in its full entirety and recommended that you purchase a copy to read for yourself. You will find their site listed under Suggested Reading.